Care what you share?

At the outset of this post, let me agree with some of you who believe that I am having a sort of a 'content' hangover. I am. And so, this one is a follow up on the previous post and once again, attempts to decode the 'content significance' mystery.

We all share updates and links on our various social profiles. While some may employ this for genuine dissemination of interesting information or even better, to spread knowledge, there are others who use this merely as a tool to scream out their likes and dislikes. Now, I don't have a problem with the latter but if online personality perceptions are based on the content shared then I think we need to rethink. 

On my twitter timeline, i realize that there are two sorts of content propagators: 1) who tweet their own content & 2) who provide links to content not produced by them. Both are fair and totally justified actions. 

However, when I see a person tweeting excessively, say about 20 tweets per day, I often wonder if he even known whats written in there? Correct me if I am wrong but my imagination fails me when I think of so much information assimilation for an individual. 

And I certainly have a problem if a person is sharing content without going through it himself. Why? Simply because online medium believes 'content is king' and thus, I form my opinions and beliefs on the nature & kind of content being shared. And if content is being shared unthoughtfully, I am being cheated. 

Maybe I am being cynical about the whole content sharing business but I believe that somehow we have taken 'content is king' mantra for granted for the online medium and are overlooking other important elements which actually govern online behaviour. 

For one, I am really wary of desperate, wannabe influencers, who may use the apparently impressive, 20-links per day strategy or even bloggers, who blog not for the sake of content/information but in order to create clout and followers. I know of people, who keep daily track of their increase in followers and write anything, just anything, to keep those followers entertained and hooked. I wonder if the latter will ever realize, in such cases, that they are being consumed than the content. 

I believe that a real influencer thinks and knows. He can explain and debate. He is an observer and an analyzer. Simply put, he may send out just one blog per week or even tweet a day but the content in that one post will be information rich and fact furnished.

And I question this way because I do not share anything online without completely assimilating the piece. Do you do the same? Do you care what you share?

 

mine?

suspended into nothingness
with a reign of uniformity
without a hint of reality
loosley floating

tangled happiness
knotted dreams
which string do i pull?
which one belongs to me?


ps: will be transporting my poems from the old blog and the post script will contain the original date of writing. This one - May 2, 2007

Now I'll tell what is the problem with this world

Ok! i'll tell you what is the problem with this world! It is contained in the people of this world and ....(gear up! for the revelation......)

..is the lack of EMPATHY in them.

One episode, of the hundreds i come across daily, will perfectly tell you why and how. It really freaked me out!

Time : 7.00 pm 'ish
Place: in a local BEST bus, Mumbai

Scene: The bus was crowded, actually over crowded as usual and people clambered in, groping here and there and gripping almost anything for support. I found a relatively convenient spot to stand and with my bag, a wet umbrella and a plastic bag, stretched and held the bar above for balance.

Once settled, i looked around and noticed that there were almost 12 seats reserved for ladies. Now, i knew there were this sort of reservation for woman but 12 seats!!! ....(pause) ...ok, taken, 12 seats and on the other side, i saw 4 seats reserved for senior citizens and 4 for handicapped (or was it 2?)

anyways, soon an old grandpa sort uncle came and stood beside me. That poor man was short and could hardly reach the bar above. He was trying hard to stand still. I looked at him and turned away in a typical life-is-like-that conclusion but then immediately i turned to the seats for the senior citizens.

while 2 seats were occupied by an old couple, the other two had an apparently educated, young girls sitting and they were friends. I know this coz they were constantly chattering. The short, old uncle was standing right in front of them. So, they cannot give an excuse that they did not see him.

I waited for a while to see if they rightfully give him his seat but they did not. Furious, i asked uncle where he would get down. He told me, " nahi nahi..yaha nahi...door hai"(No..no..not here...its far). I told him to ask one of the girls to get up coz the seat was reserved for him. I was loud and we were close enough to the girls and they had stopped their giggling and were looking at us with a blank face. I looked at them and so did the uncle. They both looked away.

I told him that there are so many seats for women, its ok if he asks them to get up. Again, he turned to the girls and now they were pretending to be oblivious. The uncle turned to me, smiled and said, "rehne do...ladki log hai, kaha khade honge bheed mein" (let it be. they are young girls. it will be difficult for them to stand in a crowded bus).

I looked at the girls once again and I know they were listening to our conversation but they did not respond. I was angry, like really angry. I wanted to scream at them for their disrespect not only to the old man but also to civic rules.

I kept staring at them and they returned a few back but this did not fetch any action. they continued sitting, i continued standing, getting infuriated and staring at them in the hope that at least one of them would get up and the old uncle, well, he continued with his struggle to keep balance.

Even writing this is making me want to slap those irresponsible, immature creatures. I am the last person to lend any adjectives, especially negative ones, to people. but i feel these girls crossed the limits within no time.

I do not expect anyone, including these girls, to offer seats to the elderly if it is unreserved (now, whether there should be any this sort of reservation at all or not, we'll talk later) seat, it is entirely up to an individual. But in this case, the old uncle rightfully deserved his seat.

However, he did not get one because the girls wrongly did not give it to him. What is the with people expecting good and fair behaviour from others but conveniently ruling out themselves from it? Havent they heard and be taught that treat others as you would like them to treat you. Really! How difficult is to understand that?


And mind you, I have seen these similar sort of young girls, who feel no qualms in asking an old man to get up from a seat reserved for woman! Imagine!!

This is just one of the several cases which happen everyday. Trains, buses, traffic laws and just a glance around the city and my simple conclusion everytime is - lack of civic sense, which stems from lack of empathy.
If you like a clean city, don't throw that chips packet anywhere but in a dustbin. But instead what each one does is, complain and expect others to not do it.

when will they start?
when all start!

and

when will all start?
when one starts!

and i don't throw chips packets, or anything for that matter, in the open. So, i can rightfully criticize.

I am sick and tired of an indifferent city. All the Mumbai spirit we talk about is rather easy to ooze out when a terrorist is at the doorstep or other calamities coming knocking. But what happens on a day-to-day basis? what spirit does the city hold then?
Dont give me the regular Not-everyone-is-like-that-shit again 'coz the majority is like this.

Hope someday it improves. If you wonder do i do my bit? Yes! i do and it is not very difficult. Just some common sense is all one needs.

Dont do it for the society but do it for yourself.The efforts will be self sustaining.
'Coz someday when everyone is doing it for themselves, they all will be collectively doing it for the society.

Contextualize this to villages, towns, cities and even nations at large and just imagine, how much better the world will be.

Phhhewww.....someday...

Sigh

I changed the boat in the middle of the sea

Its high time I write about what i do workwise or rather what i want to do. I am currently working in a PR agency in Mumbai.

Now, for people who know me but are not updated of my latest career shift, this might come as a bit of a surprise. For, my friends and classmates always saw a fiery, passionate journalist in me. Not their fault. After all, in my bachelors and masters course, i did specialize in journalism and left no stone unturned to give them that impression.

In my college classrooms, particularly in my graduate school, I always had very serious questions bearing significance to the society at large. And i was truly concerned. I wanted to change the world. My blood boiled each time i witnessed violation of law in public space, abuse of power and disregard for the people of my country. There were other professions like IAS, politics, law  which i could have adopted to pursue my change-the-world mission but i chose journalism. My reason was i loved writing. Journalism, for me, was a marriage between my two passions.

So, i studied the subject and heard and observed and pitched and interviewed and wrote and got published. In 5 years, i have finished 6 internships in print media industry. And then i was suddenly off it.

However, fresh out of post grad college, I still took up a job (coz I did not know what i wanted to do if not journalism and so i thought of at least starting work and figuring out what i wanted to do) as a trainee corresponent in one of the most prestigious news magazine in India. I was there exactly for three weeks and then i resigned. Why? Because although the profile was exactly what i was looking for, the work environment was pathetic. Now, when i look back at it, I cannot imagine myself then. crying, cribbing, cursing, complaining. I could not feel the blood in my veins. Could not feel my heart beat and my mind think. And i am not exaggerating any of this.

One fine morning i went up to the boss and blurted all of the above. She was willing to change, to make accomodations for my comfort but something in me strongly rejected the proposition. I just did not want to stay any longer. So, without a job in hand, I walked out.And man!!! did i feel good or what! What a sense of liberation! of ownership of myself! what revelry! and what happiness!

I gave a shit about the huge brand i was walking over, of whatever people said and i was happy. Here i must mention, that these 3 weeks were the toughest not only for me but also for my family and closest friends.

I was at home now, back to job hunting and this required me to be on the internet 24x7. And then social media came! Wouldnt be wrong it say that it was love at first encounter for me! I loved the idea of social media marketing. The fact that it had the power to allow me, as a brand, to talk to my real customers excited me. I sensed a huge potential and started my research. Ketan, my friend in US studying marketing and currently interning with a social media firm helped me further by recommending websites like mashable, tech crunch etc. He educated me on the social media scene in US and its inevitable growth in India.

I reached out to my PR and advertising friends from Symbi requesting them to share their resources-ppts, books etc as digital marketing was a module for them. I would like be honest here and confess that i did regret for a brief time that i did not come across this before. I would have opted for PR or advertising but its better late than never. I decided only to focus ahead from hereon.

I read extensively on SM (social media), absorbed information and began activities on my twitter, facebook and blog. Currently, I am working with Ketan on our own something on SM! I cant wait to get started on it!

rewind to 2 months back, I was finding it very difficult to find an SM profile for me - with no experience, no internships, no academic backing on the subject but only words to convey my passion and love for the field. It was not enough. While some needed an MBA degree, some needed work experience. It was not working out for me.
So, i went ahead with the PR profile offer i had and started work once again. I was careful this time to study my boss (at the interview), feel the vibe of the place and have a look at my team I was satisfied and here began my journey on the other side of journalism-in a Public Relations agency. And i am enjoying!

Luckily, the current job gives me substantial time each day to update myself on SM happening and networking for it. I am reading more about it and 'lurking' on SNS to observe and learn how business is done here. And yes, my next destinaton most definitely is an SM job.

Does it feel weird then when i meet or talk to my journo friends? Initially it did. I could have been a journo being pursued by a PR person but here i was the PR convincing journalists. It felt weird and to an extent unfair but then it grew on me. I came to terms with the change, with my new career plans, with my goals and my life.

I am happy and I am proud of myself for being there for me, when i needed the most. I am glad i stood up for my passion and belief.

Changing the boat in the middle of the sea was sure risky but, i tell you, totally worth it! i'm loving it and how! :)

The First Step

So this one is about being courageous and confident and taking that FIRST STEP which can break any wall or even ice! 

My last week, actually last month has been all about this.

~ finally credited Zainab for inspiring me to write more. (I was skeptical about writing on this 'coz i thought that may constitute to me giving importance to her and after college we havent been in good touch. But she is a darling and i couldn't kept myself from this)

~i wrote about her too, which i had been postponing again due to the above reason but i did it anyway in the previous post and she realized it was her out of nowhere. I had not even thought what would i do, say if she reads but then it all fell into place and for all the good reasons (or so i suppose!)

~started tweeting. earlier i found the idea of tweets extremely useless and rather annoying. for one thing, i never knew what to 'tweet'. i did not want to post annoying tweets like i found few of my friends do. But one fine day in office, i just let go of all inhibitions and went on to explore! and i am enjoying and how! its extremely resourceful and flooded with amazing, interesting people from whom u can learn so much if u will.

~i have stopped reacting to nonsense and in fact, learned to ignore it all together. I used to be so affected by people but now, i guess, its draining off from me. hope i continue like this FOREVER
.

~i went ahead and told my friend ketan, who is in the US, that i miss him and had a superbly heart warming conversation. earlier, i used to hold back myself coz i always assumed he has moved on (friendship wise! ) or 'drifted apart' as he once put and i did not want to look stupid sharing my nostalgia and feelings with him. (BUT what is so wrong in looking stupid. there is a difference between 'looking' stupid and 'acting' stupid. Looking stupid is more subjective i guess. new blog topic!)

~I have started commenting on blogs and news articles. Again, the reason for not doing it in the past was this constantly poking-torturous feeling of being imperfect and being judged mediocre (and how bad can that really be!? i so overact to things!). I began sending out my opinions and ideas to the world just last week and i feel good and in a strange way, liberated.

~My travel from home to work and back takes a total of 3 hours i.e. 1.5 hours one way. Since, while on my way back, i easily get a seat in the train, I have started sharing it with other travelers who stand. Say, after after about 45-50 mins of sitting, i give my away my seat. Earlier, i avoided doing this coz no one ever offered me their seat. i used to clamber and balance, jerk and stretch but none of the sitting members bothered. But then I decided to go with my heart and trust me, its one of the most effective ways to make someone happy. I hope the goodness spreads!

~I talk to my father about a lot of everyday stuff. Before i never bothered to let him know about my life. If he asked, he got the answers but i never volunteered. Then, i read 'Tuesdays with Morrie' and something in me changed for good. Now, even if he does not ask me, i tell me coz i want him to know and i want to know him more.

So, these are the different areas where i had been contemplating taking the first step but i never did coz i did not want to look stupid. I never wanted to show that i care, that i feel, that i have a heart coz i did not want to feel/be vulnerable.

I am not a person who does not express, who believes that there are some unsaid things in the world. I believe in the power of expression and like i have said before, in the power of love.

This way of living also let you know who, among your people, are genuinely concerned, truly care and absolutely love. speaking from experience here!

Moral of the story: About whatever it is, you are contemplating making the first move. Just do it. It will help you become a better person. Most definitely.

My new white shoes and more.....

Last Saturday, i bought myself white ballet shoes and since then, I'm dressing in a way appropriate to include it in my 'look' (for the lack of word right now). So, today I'm in green and beige stripes skirt, black top and WHITE SHOES! now, you may think the colours are incompatible with each other but strangely, they fit fine! the bright white on my feet is making me happier than the pizza i had last night! and FYI a pizza really really makes me happy!

Then there is the cacophony of thoughts in my mind and i cannot comprehend any of them. Marketing-gym-blank-blank-love-gym-clothes-books-blank.....This was a small example i pulled out from there for you. So there is a lot, i am aware, and i have decided to let it settle down before i  start my analysis.

Barring the mind, the routine life is happy and easy. At work, stuff is simple and well, rare. As in, i rarely do the work i am being paid for. No! its not me! its just that there is only so much work! I am satisfied with it, however. I am learning at a slow pace which allows things to sink in deep (or so i think!) and i also get substantial time each day to explore what i am going to step into in sometime from now (how precise!).

I read up a lot on social media these days and there is so much out there about it. More on this later. Right now, I am more interested in just unfolding myself with this post.

While going through a friends blog, stumbled upon a blog which belongs to someone from my post grad college. I had limited interaction with her while we were arrested on our isolated hill top campus. Had been to her room just 2-3 times and i instantly took a liking to her then. i vividly remember this collage of her friends pictures she had up her wall. Her side of the room spoke a language i could not understand but relate to. She was 'my type' and i always gave her my warmest smiles.

But i never went beyond that, never initiated a talk or sat with her over breakfast/lunch/dinner. I concluded it would be rather weird, for her and me, if i did all this and expressed my inclination to her. So, i held myself back and gradually, she dissolved into 'others'. Only, today, this blog resurfaced the inexplicable familiarity.

The two years i spent there taught me a lot, to say the least. I do not wish to explain myself here. It was life changing. In both, good and bad ways. Period.

Digressing, I cleaned and sorted my cupboard over the weekend. I just cannot discard old clothes and books. It was tough and i still retained a few merely for memories sake. But now there in enough space for new things to come in. Metaphorically, a lesson in philosophy. Taken.


It is raining heavily these days and as i have said before on this blog, i love the sound of it. Yesterday, was drenched from head to toe and i walked to my house from station to enjoy the showers a little longer.

..and then Morrie told me a secret!

Yesterday I read 'Tuesdays with Morrie' and after a very..very long time, a book moved to the extent that there were silent tears streaming down my cheeks. After a long time indeed.

I feel sad that i never had a teacher like Morrie in my life. I  always hoped to meet someone so inspiring, always was on a look out . I tried my best to know my teachers, to talk beyond the classrooms, tried my best to squeeze out all their wisdom, their ideas and opinions but none of them could become a Morrie to me.
Something was always lacking.

Yesterday, while reading the book, while on one hand the grief of absence of such a figure grew, on the other i simply could not fathom the will of a human being. where does it begin and where does it end? what is the limit? actually, is there a limit at all?

I loved the aphorisms Morrie came up with.
~ Love each other or perish

~ Dying is only one thing to be sad over. Living unhappily is something else.

..and there are so many more. His conclusion and teaching, of someone walking towards his mortal end and assessing his journey, was 'LOVE - give and  be open to it.' only therein lies, true happiness. This was not something new but perhaps, the most repeated statements and the most taken-for-granted in our world so busy accruing money and fame, running away from the most basic to something grand and larger than life.

I particularly loved this one part where Albom (the author) asks Morrie that if he was granted a healthy body for a day, what would he do? what would you do, if you were ailing and had a day with a good health? I would fly off to some country on my 'to-visit' list with my family, my best friends and spend a day with them doing anything.

But Morrie did not select any exotic destination or celebrity moments, he instead chose a simple breakfast, a lunch with family and friends at his house, a swim, a dance, a chat, a conversation, a discussion and dinner with his people again, right there in the city in which he had lived for most of his life. He could see the specialness in the ordinary. Most of us dont. I dont and probably, that is the reason why all of us are so dissatisfied. always craving for something more but we dont know what.

I also refreshed another important learning: Man is a social animal. I was taught this in my primary school but somewhere with my experiences with people made me dislike the species. my own species. i had carefully picked my set of people and conveniently declared the rest as greedy, selfish, immature, foolish etc. But Morrie told me a secret yesterday. He said,"You need people to help you with your stuff when you're born and then when you're old and frail and most people know this. But i'll tell you a secret that you need people even in the between". There it is! So simple! and key to happiness.

How did i ever imagine happiness on my isolated island? Here, I am also reminded of this movie 'Into the Wild' and the crux of the movie was "Happiness is real only when it is shared". Again said by someone on his deathbed and who was on a mission to find what is life and what is happiness.

I remember as a kid, i always only saw the good in everybody i came across. It was easy. It was right there, so clear. Its easy to love. real easy to give. Then, i grew up! and complexities grew. i was told and unfortunately, i started believing that world is a bad, bad place. people are mean and selfish, so BEWARE!

So i was always on my guard, cautious and unwilling to open myself up to anyone. Scared that they might read me, know me and abuse my existence. After reading the book, i mourn over the time i have lost and wonderful people i have missed because of this belief.

This was probably one of the biggest conflict i had. What is this about the world and people? What do they want and why? I realized i was out of focus, the question is what is this world and what is me? what do i want and why? and i have these answers!

He makes an excellent point when he says:


 Life is a series of back and forth(Tension of the opposites). You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn't. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted...

Simple to understand, isnt it?